First Reading on Meditation

Have a moment for yourself, brew a cup of tea, and read and re-read this quote for 10 times. It will only take 30 mins:

"Ego is able to convert everything to its own use, even spirituality. For example, if you have learned of a particularly beneficial meditation technique of spiritual practice, then ego's attitude is first to regard it as an object of fascination, and, second to examine it. Finally, since ego is seemingly solid and cannot really absorb anything, it can only mimic. Thus ego tries to examine and imitate the practice of meditation and the meditative way of life. When we have learned all the tricks and answers of the spritual game, we automatically try to imitate spirituality, since real involvement would require the complete elimination of ego, and actually the last thing we want to do is give up the ego completely. However, we cannot experience that which we are trying to imitate; we can only find some area within the bounds of ego that seems to be the same thing. Ego translates everything in terms of it's own state of health, it's own inherent qualities. It feels a sense of great accomplishment and excitement at having been able to create a pattern. At last it has creatives a tangible accomplishment, a confirmation of it's own individuality.

If we become successful at maintaining our self consciousness through spiritual techniques, then genuine spiritual development is highly unlikely. Our mental habits become so strong as to be hard to penetrate. We may even go so far as to achieve the totally demonic state of complete "Egohood"." ~Chögyam Trungpa

Shambhala: The Sacred Path of the Warrior